All That Jazz

                               An exerpt from a book I'm writing;

                       All That Jazz:

I decided it was either time to begin my story again or to finish it for good. The only problem was I didn’t know how to say good-bye.

Stepping over the fence I started to climb up the cliffs, pulse racing and hands shaking. I took a path that I knew too well –a path that I will never be able to forget. As I reached the very top I went to the edge, tears streaming down my face, seeing the scene from oh-so long ago right in front of me, as if I were sixteen again. It had all happened so fast, just a few seconds, but by three-Mississippi my life had already changed. Because the next thing I knew, my dad was falling and I called out to him but what could I do? He was already gone. I wanted to go to the edge and look, you know. But I was afraid. 
Then, there I was, staring off in the distance, letting the cold ocean breeze flow over my face and dry my tears. I closed my eyes, realizing the regret. I was sorry. Sorry that I hadn’t let myself forget. Sorry that I felt such jealousy to how happy my dad was when he was alive. And I was disappointed. In myself and in the way things turned out.

I realized I missed my chance a long time ago. I wouldn't ever be able to say goodbye.